For some reason, I seem to almost be missing my dancing career. I made a few videos to see myself on the pole, and of course I threw in dancing as well. It was the first time in a very long time I was like “Damn, I am good at that.” My entire life I have struggled with sticking to things, simply because there is not an instant reward. With dancing, there was an instant reward. Not only was I in incredible shape, very strong, HEAD strong, but I was literally having money thrown at me for it. I always felt beautiful, and I was. But only on the outside.
When I was dancing, I met women from ALL over. I met the girls who you think we all are- $200 blowjobs, extras in private, all for drugs. Something incredible though; I met the most unique/inspirational and most importantly, happy women. Women just like me. Father issues, eating issues, death, rape, abandonment.. more things than anyone could imagine. Some of these girls; took this power- and they put themselves through school, bought homes for them and their children, and currently are living/building an absolute empire! Everyone always thought I was this strong, I gave everyone my “life-story”, from the customers to the dancers; every single soul got the same exact story. None of it was true.
*intro ch. 5*